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Hello Hello /alternately entitled: the tale of "DEVIL SQUIRREL" TM - International Squirrel Liberation Army
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Subject:Hello Hello /alternately entitled: the tale of "DEVIL SQUIRREL" TM
Time:09:04 pm
Current Mood:mischievousmischievous
I am new. I thought your community was neat. My name is April and I am an avid duck loving squirrel at heart.
So in part of my hello hello, let me tell you about the squirrel in my life..

Out in front of my house there is a tree. In this tree lives the most evil creature on earth. I fervently refer to him as "DEVIL SQUIRREL" TM. There are no other squirrels that live on my street. When I first moved here (2yrs ago) The only other squirrel I saw was a dead one. On the road. Coincidence? I think not! So he would sit on his branch above us and make this barking sound. Hrrrumph! Hrrrumph!
Recently I have seen a few squirrels try to move onto his turf. They would move all cautious and get closer and closer. Out of nowhere comes devil squirrel who chases them down and beats the living cashews out of them. I have seen devil squirrel stare down cars while making a keening noise like a crow. He eyes up children as I would eye up a steak. Sometimes when you leave your house he is digging in your garden right next to your door. Now most squirrels would run, at least look scared. Not "DEVIL SQUIRREL" TM. He stays exactly where he is and does that slow horror movie head turning that the psychos do. Thus far I have managed to appease him by placing peanuts under his tree as would an aborigine making an offering to a dark malignant deity.

I think that he may in fact be one of these ---> http://web.wt.net/~psherr/squirrel_hazing.htm
The end I guess.. for now. =P (All true stuff. The squirrel is insane. I thought maybe he had rabies or something when I moved here, but he does. He just has evil in his soul. heh)
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enfant_noir
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Time:2003-12-13 06:27 am (UTC)
That was pretty freakin funny!
Welcome to the fold. Perhaps we can help protect you from the evil squirrel. :)
Have you tried an exorcism?
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dukgrrl
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Time:2003-12-13 10:56 am (UTC)
I don't think that I want to get that close to him. You know how it is with evil things.. sure you can take down the little ones with crosses and holy water. The true manifestations of evil on earth however.. well that stuff just plain pisses them off.
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jeshua
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Time:2003-12-13 01:45 pm (UTC)
I know. I share a house with a guy that (jokingly) refers to himself as the Anti-John-the-Baptist.
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Hello Hello /alternately entitled: the tale of "DEVIL SQUIRREL" TM - International Squirrel Liberation Army
View:Recent Entries.
View:Archive.
View:Friends.
View:Profile.
View:Website (The V.A.).